


First Kisses

by Aithilin



Category: Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle
Genre: First Kisses, Fluff, Infinity Arc, Kisses, M/M, ansgt, nihon arc, yama arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-19
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-03 03:45:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6595276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aithilin/pseuds/Aithilin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They had a few first kisses, really.</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Kisses

Their first kiss was not what he had expected. Granted, at the time, he was still high on battlefield adrenaline— still covered in blood and bruises, still feeling that rush and ache and excitement clawing its way through his veins. He acted on impulse (as he often had, in his past), acted out of want and desire and the simple immediate _need_ that told him to just _take_. 

So their first kiss was not what he expected when he took it. He had wanted it to be heated, to be wanted, to be returned. Wanted the bloodlust to be shared. 

Instead, he had pressed his lips to cold, unresponsive lips. Pressed a bloody hand to silver-gold hair. Pushed towards an unyielding, ungiving body until he had to pull back in confusion. He had seen Fai’s smile on the battlefield, had seen the smile with their comrades in this strange, battle-hungry world, saw the soft smile spared only for the lonely king they had agreed (in their own way) to fight for. 

And he had misread. 

He wanted to fight, to fuck, to get closer and closer. He wanted to attack those ice cold walls his companion had put up. He wanted to _take_. 

Their first kiss was not what Kurogane wanted, in the end. It was one-sided, it was his aggression, his battle-lust, his adrenaline. And Fai… Fai was still untouchable. They had grown close, yes, without words, without the kids close at hand. They had learnt to read each other in battles and in camps, to predict and flow and keep their backs to each other. He had learnt that Fai made kill shots, merciful and clean. He struck from afar, and only joined the deep fray when he followed after the trail of destruction left by Kurogane. 

Fai, with a soft shake of his head and a (sad?) smile, doused Kurogane then and there— drained the fight from his blood, reminded him of the ache of his wounds (as mild as it was), made Kurogane feel almost like a child again. 

Kurogane did not count it as a real first kiss. It had been a mistake. 

The only noise between them was a small click of tongue and breath as Kurogane left to take the rejection and confusion out on the training fields. 

—

The first time Fai kissed Kurogane, it was not nice. It was harsh and biting. Sharp and meant to wound. To rip open and shatter and spill those feelings Kurogane had let well up to the surface every time he forced the monster to feed. It was punishment and heated, vengeful and angry. 

Kurogane hadn’t had to cut anything that night. Hadn’t needed to tempt the monster— the beast that Fai only controlled for the sake of his princess. They were both bloody and beaten, and Sakura was already shaken from a victory only secured by Fai’s ruthless nature seeping into her own natural determination. They were both reminded that they were only pieces in a game— both of this world of black and white, and in something larger than they both cared to think about. 

The monster was close that night. Hateful and resenting the weakness that made it. Hungry and frustrated. Clawing and shining gold and acting with quicksilver speed to push the larger man to the wall with a growl. 

“Is this what you want, Kurogane?” 

It wasn’t hissed or spat, or purred or left between them on a knife’s edge. Fai knew his tones and his voice— had felt the affection and emotion his prey carried, had heard it thrumming through his veins and saw it in the way his prey pushed and shoved and kicked him out of harm’s way on the battlefields they crossed. It was left flat and loveless, even as the blond pushed and clawed, and worked too sharp teeth from warm lips to bare throat. 

It was flat between them even when Kurogane shoved him away after his fill and watched as an elegant hand wiped away a smear of blood that leaked past the seal of lips. 

It was left between them when gold shifted back to blue, but the stance of the monster, the beast, the thing born of desperation and love stayed. 

“Don’t you want me, Kurogane?”

“Fuck off.”

——

Their first kiss— the one they could both agree on, the one they could both share— came when Kurogane’s jaw hurt and he felt the sensation of an arm he thought should still be resting at his side. It came under the light of a familiar moon, with the scents and sights and warmth of home seeping into everything that he was and wanted to be. It came chasing on the footsteps of fear and panic and worry.

Fai was still cold. 

The chill of Celes still bit at them. He could feel it in his arm— the one that rested in blood, with the dead, sealed in an unreachable world. He could see it in the shadows under Fai’s eye, and in the grief that rested on his shoulders— open and honest. 

Their first kiss, the one that they both agreed on, came with Fai pressed against him, a blanket thrown over them both, as they watched the stars in the garden above the palace. 

Kurogane had considered the movement first, debated their history, their rejections, the lies and the truths now between them. He shifted first, to look down at pale hair, as slender shoulders. He thought of how pretty the moon looked, reflected against Fai’s natural peace. He thought of how pretty the gardens looked, open and inviting to Fai’s natural joy. 

Fai kissed the bruise forming on his jaw first. Kurogane kissed the mage’s forehead. 

Under the blanket, worried over the not-dead princess they both loved like a daughter, and under the warmth of the familiar air. They watched the stars until Fai giggled over their first kiss and danced away from his Kuro-sama’s one-armed reach and the teasing and games began again.


End file.
